Discovering the ideas of grandchildren about the 2020 coronavirus pandemic is the first group effort of Fuquay-Varina’s Capturing Wisdoms Project, a collaboration of four writers from southern Wake County, NC, committed to recording inspiring stories of local people.
We keep hearing, “We’re all in this together.” Our small group of informants, who range in age from 4 to 32, prove this to be remarkably true. Even the youngest among us understands more than we imagine, and each grandchild has a unique way of distilling wisdom into a clear and timely message for us all.
Interview with great-grandson, Niko Sanchez, age 4, by great-grandmother, Valerie Macon
What is coronavirus?
Coronavirus means that you can get sick and die. Viruses are sick and could make people die.
Is your school closed because of the coronavirus?
Yeah. I want to go to school today, but I can’t because of coronavirus. Miss Missy is at home now; she’s in her house. School is shut down, but my house didn’t shut down. Houses don’t shut down.
Do you do your schoolwork at home?
No, I do it at my school.
Are stores open during the coronavirus?
Some stores are opening if there is a walk-in. That means we will have to go to the drive-in to get a kitty cat for Pop’s birthday. I want to go to the car wash and sit in the front seat.
Do you think the car washes are open?
Yeah, some of them are open.
Do you wash your hands a lot because of coronavirus?
Yes. If you get the coronavirus on your hands, then you will die. It will make you bleed; it will take your skin off; it will make people die.
If you wash your hands and wear a mask, then you won’t get coronavirus?
I don’t like wearing masks because when you have a mask on, you can’t put food in your mouth.
What if you had a hole in your mask, could you eat then?
Well, then the virus could get in too, like, into my mouth.
Interview with Wyatt Stalling, age 6.5, by grandfather, Don Perlmutter
What is coronavirus?
It’s a type of sickness that you get really sick, and one day you die.
Does everyone who gets the coronavirus die?
No.
What happens if you catch it?
You get really sick.
What is it that makes you sick?
The corona.
Does everyone get sick?
No, unless you get too close to them.
What makes you catch it?
Germs.
What are germs?
They’re these really tiny things, and if they get on other people, it could make them sick.
What are the ways that you can keep from catching it?
Uh…you can wear a mask! And don’t stay near other people.
What do you call that when you stay away from other people?
Distancing. If you see someone with the coronavirus or you think they have it, just walk away.
Does that mean you can’t go inside places?
You can go inside your home, but we’d rather not anybody go inside of stores.
What are the things you can’t do because of coronavirus?
You can’t go to much places.
Like stores?
Yeah, you can’t go to breakfast.
And where did you used to go that you can’t go to anymore?
IHOP.
Where did you go with other boys and girls?
Field trips, pumpkin patches.
So you can’t go to school?
Yeah.
What is it about school that you miss the most?
Hmmm…learning, teachers. I miss my friends.
Do you like staying home, or would you rather be in school?
Home, so I can spend more time with my family.
Do you think coronavirus will ever go away, or will it stay like this forever?
Uh, it will go away.
What will make it go away?
Just distancing and masks.
Interview with grandson, Logan Macon, age 13, by grandmother, Valerie Macon.
When school closed, how far into 7th grade were you, and were there any milestone events you missed?
I was about to begin the last quarter of the term. I missed the awards ceremony where they hand out report cards. The last one matters, and it will be missed, too.
Is there any aspect of being present in the classroom that you miss?
I like interacting with the teacher while learning. I miss having friends to talk to. Now, the teachers post lessons virtually; some meetings don’t even show faces.
How do you accomplish your schoolwork now?
The teacher posts questions and answers questions about the lesson. I put myself on a schedule. I sleep in later, but as soon as I wake up, I start my work because I just want to get it done. I spend 3 or 4 hours a day doing schoolwork.
Are there any school activities that you were involved in that you can no longer participate in being out of school?
I miss Beta Club. This is a service club that supports community projects like Coats for Kids, food drives, and Cancer Awareness Month activities. I miss the personal interaction with others and helping people real-time through this club.
Do you talk with any of your friends about coronavirus and their thoughts about not being able to finish out the school semester?
I text friends and play video games with them. We don’t talk much about coronavirus. Some just say, “I wish we were in school;” others are really happy about being home.
Do you have any outside activities that you’ve had to give up due to social distancing and the stay-at-home order?
I can no longer go to my Krav Maga class in person. I’ve been taking Krav Maga for three years; now I attend the class online.
Do you consider the stay-at-home order a hardship or an opportunity?
I consider it a valuable opportunity because I’m still learning, and I’m able to explore other interests because I have more free time. I not only play video games, but I’m exploring making games, learning coding online. I’ve started reading books again, and I’m spending more time outdoors. I’ve gone on a couple of 20-mile bike rides with family, and hiking in the woods.
Do you have any thoughts about this historic pandemic and shutdown?
I see the pandemic shutdown as an overreaction. But, for me, I think it’s a time that is special and good, a time to pursue things I enjoy doing but haven’t had enough time for. People who use their time wisely have an opportunity to grow and better themselves.
Interview with grandson, Will King, age 18, by grandmother, Nancy King.
When did campus close?
We went on Spring Break and that was it, we didn’t go back. The thing I regret most is, if I knew it was coming, I would have tried to see my friends more. The worst part is, being president, I had a lot of stuff planned.
What kind of stuff did you have planned?
Senior Spring was something to look forward to; we were gonna kick back and hang out as much as possible.
You might not see some of these people again?
That’s true. I’m speaking at the end-of-school ceremony. I say in my speech that we might not see each other again. We’re planning an in-person graduation ceremony August 1.
How do you feel about it being postponed? Like you got cheated?
No, I don’t feel cheated. Maybe if it would have been intentional, that’s bad, but it’s not under anyone’s control.
What else did you miss out on?
Seniors have a Senior Skip Day after the prom, and everyone goes to the beach. That didn’t happen. I was really looking forward to prom . . . but I’m not heartbroken. You have to move on.
What are you doing with your time?
Learning new skills and using the time to be productive. I’m learning how to code online. I’m also trading stocks. I use Dad’s account and I’m doing well, actually, making money.
What kind of stuff will you never go back to, or do differently?
Concerts aren’t going to happen for a while. Can you see me in a mosh pit? No way. You’re not gonna shake someone’s hand for the next five years. Either that or people are going to have hand sanitizer everywhere. I used to touch my face a lot, but I don’t do that anymore.
How do you picture the world in 2050?
You always think you’re going to walk outside and see flying cars. Now you’re going to walk outside and see nobody because they’re all indoors.
How do you imagine the immediate future for college?
The social part of college won’t be the same. You won’t interact as much or go out as much.
Do you feel safe and secure with the future?
Yeah, I do. I mean everything is going to work out.
What will you tell your kids about 2020?
I think you can only explain in terms that are relevant to them, like if they are seniors, ‘this is what my senior year was like.’ It’s history, like the moon landing.
How will life be different for your kids?
I don’t think it’s going to be super different for kids growing up now. I go to a doctor’s office and parents and kids are all on their devices. Kids are so accustomed to technology it won’t be such a shock. They’re already living like they’re in quarantine.
Interview with granddaughter, Nicole Dirlam, age 32, by grandfather, David Kirk Dirlam
What was life like before the virus hit?
I worked for architects 8 hours a day, sometimes more. Outside of work I would see my friend Corinne.
How did the stay-at-home order affect you?
I like working from home. It opened up different experiences. Diamond Park is right behind my apartment with a creek and trails. Before the stay-at-home order, I never even went there. Also, I’m eating much healthier. I get a produce box instead of going to the grocery store.
What do you do outside of work?
I cook much more. I go for hikes at Alameda beach with a friend. Corinne wears a mask and washes her hands; she is safe to come over and work. I haven’t had anyone else in my house.
How did it change your craftwork?
It definitely allowed me more time to think about what I want to do. Before, I only had weekends or after work, and I was often too tired to come up with good ideas. Now, with no commuting or going-out evenings, I have more time.
What are you making?
I’m doing some painting, beadwork, and sewing. With drawing, I’m experimenting with different styles, trying to find my voice and medium.
What advice would you give singles in Fuquay-Varina?
Single people need to appreciate their own space. This is a good experience for me. I’m enjoying being myself. I take a bath, listen to music, have a glass of wine. It’s a soothing time. I’m making the time to get to know myself.
Reflections on the Wisdoms of Grandchildren in the 2020 Pandemic
From the youngest to the oldest, each of our informants expresses some age-appropriate sense of loss over the coronavirus shutdown. But at the same time, there is a common, grateful turning towards home as a place to slow down, re-center, improve and learn new skills, and reconnect with family.
Contrary to the popular mantra that we are living in stressful times, they have described the shutdown as a soothing time, a time to get to know oneself, a chance to connect with what we love. At the core, this reset seems to be what their hearts have desired all along, perhaps even what we modern, frenzied people have needed all along—to just slow down and enjoy those things that have been waiting right in front of us.
Four-year-old Niko expresses this sentiment well, “My house didn’t shut down. Houses don’t shut down.”
